Is a Dunkin Donuts Bitch Worse Than a Starbucks Bitch?

The names in this one will definitely not be revealed in order to protect the guilty.

Last night Debbie and I had dinner with some dear friends from the MSX (Medford Strikers Xtreme) and at one point the talk turned to girls soccer rivalries of years past and trash talk between parents of opposing teams. As the story goes, a mother on an opposing team apparently annoyed some Xtreme parents and one of the MSX mothers called her a "Dunkin Donuts bitch." I had never heard this before and am tempted to call the woman who coined the term and ask her how a Dunkin Donuts bitch compares to, say, a Starbucks bitch, or a Tim Hortons bitch, and if a Dunkin Donuts bitch is better or worse than a Wawa bitch.

Speaking of trash talk among parents, back when my son, Scott, played for the '81-'82 Medford Strikers, our parents had a habit of getting into chirping with the parents of the Cape Express. Our U14 year we won the State Cup, and then had to play our last conference game at Cape May. It was a cold, wind-swept December day in Cape May Court House when we played and we were missing one starter due to a suspension for yellow cards and another for basketball. During the game, one of our parents made a comment about a call by the referee. "Now I see why they call you the 'Medford Crybabies,'" said a Cape mother. "I thought they called us the state champions," replied one of our mothers. Best comeback I ever heard. Even some of the Express fathers smiled and nodded their approval. And we won the game - and the conference.